Dec 7, 2009

The Ultimate Vision Statement

The following can be considered as the Ultimate Vision Statement for a business or corporate entity. The name of this fictitious corporate entity will be defined as BrainCube Inc and will attempt to utilize as many Corporate Buzzwords as I can manage prior to personally bursting into flames while my eyes melt and ears explode.

I have graciously highlighted each corporate buzzword for your amusement.

While the obvious buzzphrase is Vision Statement (and has been highlighted), the company name itself, BrainCube Inc, was chosen at random via an online Web 2.0 Name Generator which mashes together buzzwords to create new name suggestions. As a result, the name of the company is also a buzzword and shall be highlighted.

Do not attempt to adjust your screen. Bright green text is normal...


BrainCube Inc Vision Statement for 2009-2010

Braincube Incorporated is a client-focused component of a core business portfolio whose customer driven deliverables empower emerging technologies, enabling an integrated knowledgeable mindset among our resources. Through our standards, procedures, and documentation solutions we create a world-class, win-win, results-driven repository of service offerings which ramp-up productivity and empower our team to go the extra mile to create a synergistic, information based, integrated infrastructure for mission-critical, market-based, interim leverage opportunities.

With our recent proactive realignment, BrainCube Incorporated is engaging our assets through strategic and tactical rightsizing opportunities, leading to an unprecedented 538% increase in productivity among team players as recently noted in a widely held yellow pad study. Refocusing our efforts on repeatable resource management opportunities, BrainCube Incorporated has become a premier player in the global economic ecosystem through prioritizing our approach, clearing our executive pipeline, and pushing the envelope to foster a clear and precise paradigm shift for our market.

Through trend forecasting, and the use of social media marketing campaigns, our company will bring our services offering to the next level, ensuring a demographically compelling and viral nature among fast track individuals across a global environment. Concentrating our efforts on high profile individuals in the loop, we can expect to peel back the onion and push the envelope of our demographic reach while touching base with less fortunate entities which may be out of the loop.

BrainCube Incorporated, through our value added subsidiaries and holdings, aims to offer cross-functional, initiative focused, opportunities in a world of movers and shakers through strategic hard-ball dealings and a favorable rollout.